That’s a great question that sometimes we get when it comes to weddings and hey, we get it, weddings are expensive.

So, today I wanted to take a couple of minutes and explore the question, give you the answer and insights as to why.

The answer is, it depends.

While popular websites like Junebug weddings and Every Last Detail say that you shouldn’t negotiate with your vendors, the truth is it really depends on a couple of factors.

First, it depends on where you’re getting married, and second, it depends on what it is that you’re asking for in the first place.

Location is an important piece of trying to get some wiggle room out of a vendor, living in a popular location like Washington DC, New York City, or Beverly Hills, for example, chances are you will not have any room for negotiations, it’s all dependant on the marketplace.

That’s due to the fact that higher-priced markets require more money to live, so trying to get a vendor to lower their costs is harder.

Locations that are smaller like Harrisonburg, VA, which is a small college town will offer a better chance of saving money with vendors.

Take a look at these neighboring markets to the ones above and their average wedding vendor costs.

And with location also comes the saturation rates of wedding vendors, this is what I mean.

Let’s take Charleston, South Carolina, it’s a small market with a lot of charm. If you visit WeddingWire and search for venues, then wedding photographers you’ll see that there is a gap in between them.

What this tells you is that for every venue, there are roughly 1.82 wedding photographers which are almost twice as many. (that’s a 1:1.82 ratio)

So what does this mean in the Charleston, SC market as a bride getting married?

It means that you will find that wedding photographer rates will be cheaper and they are more likely to work with you on price than some other markets.

Next is what you're asking for in the first place with regards to negotiating in the first place.

If you are wanting to shave off a bunch of money in order to book the vendor, chances are it will not work unless it’s a budget range vendor that just needs work, any kind of work. You may have the best chances of shaving a few dollars but the tradeoff is the lack of experience they have.

Vendors spend a lot of money in their parts of the industry, it’s common for a wedding photographer to spend easily $10,000 or more for their equipment, DJ’s can spend upwards of $15,000, and wedding videographers, $25,000+.

Wedding venues need hundreds of thousands in bookings alone to break even, let alone be profitable, the mortgage on the property, hiring staff to clean, set up and maintain, decor, it all costs money.

So asking for a discount many times is of the table even if you ask, but there are other value savings you can ask for which I’ll get to in a moment.

Those are just a couple of examples, then you have marketing, business taxes, licensing, insurance, and a slue of other operational expenses couples don’t think about.

And since couples demand much more from vendors today than 20 or 30 years ago, prices for good vendors are somewhat high.

Reasons to Negotiate with Wedding Vendors

There are a few things that you may be able to work with when it comes to vendors and that’s usually in the services department.

Sometimes, you can work with a vendor to get something that you really want for little or no added costs, but I want you to think small here.

An item or service

Take wedding catering as an example.

If the catering company provides you a set price for a menu, you may be able to swap one side that you don’t like for another that costs just as much that you do like. You could also ask for an added item if it’s within reason, for example, the use of plates and silverware rather than disposable ware.

In a wedding video for example, maybe a drone isn’t important to you but a live stream is, you may be able to swap the two if they are reasonably close in cost and they are options with the vendor.

If you are comparing vendors and they have the same pricepoint

Having found two vendors with similar products or services, you might be able to work with them to get a slightly better price.

Be upfront and tell both vendors that you have quotes from another company and see if they are willing to offer something to push you to work with them instead of the other vendor.

It can be tricky here, so show them the other vendor’s quote and don’t egg them on.

Sometimes a vendor may knock off a little bit of money or they may add something in your quote to sweeten the deal so you’ll book with them.

Other times they may stick to their pricing and justify their price and explain why they charge what they do.

Just don’t expect to save huge amounts of money here, again think small, perhaps 5-10% at most.

Reasons NOT to Negotiate with Wedding Vendors

The truth however is that you can’t always compare vendor services as apples to apples and that’s because they all offer different services, packages and come with various levels of experience too.

If you see two wedding photographers for example and they are both the same service and offer similar imagery types but have far different prices, then you are paying the higher one based on their experience.

Asking a vendor to knock off part of their rate so you can hire them will not work 99% of the time.

Experience is Part of It

Experience can benefit you because they will be able to help correct a mistake on the spot or minimize it so it’s not a big issue.

One thing that comes to mind is operating a camera during a wedding.

An experienced pro will be able to know what lenses to use for the wedding based on its location where someone less experienced may not and your images turn out grainy and dark.

It’s their Livihood too

Additionally, vendors set their pricing so they can make a living and I don’t mean they live a penthouse life either, in fact, only 2% of wedding vendors are considered luxury wedding vendors and live a high-dollar lifestyle.

The rest of us live paycheck to paycheck, some better than others, but they are small business owners that are just trying to get by financially.

Think about it this way, do people come to where you work and negotiate an hourly rate for what you do?

I highly doubt it.

It’s Also Insulting to Vendors

When I was much younger in my wedding career, I would get a lot of people coming to me and telling me that they loved my work, but couldn’t afford my costs, which 22 years ago were about $1,100 for a wedding video.

Sometimes, couples would simply tell me they only needed me for a handful of hours and wanted a cheaper rate.

In many way’s it was insulting because they had no idea my experience behind the camera at TV stations and Hollywood, they didn’t know the massive cost in gear or all the hours I work after the wedding in post-production either.

Well, fast-forward today and many couples still don’t think about the pre-production or post-production time a vendor does to make the day happen, because that’s really what you are paying for, not so much the day itself.

Vendors that do a lot of Pre-Production work for a Wedding

• Venues

• Florists

• Catering Companies

• Cake Bakers

• DJ’s

• Officiants/Pastors

• Hair/Makeup Artists

• Wedding Planners

Vendors that do a lot of Post-Production work for a Wedding

• Wedding Photographers

• Wedding Videographers

Some Vendors Offer a Discount if You Ask

There are vendors in the market however that may provide you with a small discount should you decide to book with them and you fall in a category.

Usually, it’s fire and rescue, police, active military, K-12 educators, or something along those lines.

Most times you may need to ask about a discount as many will not list or provide that to you and they may do it because they too have ties to that industry, perhaps they worked in it at one time or they have family that does.

In fact, we conducted a survey in April 2020 and asked 200 vendors in Virginia if they offered some sort of discount. Nearly 27% said they offered some sort of discount specifically for the industry mentioned above.

Make sure they are within your budget range

Finally, you need to make sure the vendor is within your budget range before you ask about a discount, a freebie, or something to sweeten the pot.

If you are far off on your wedding budget range and what the vendor offers, you need to look elsewhere.

As an example, if you want to hire a $4,000 wedding photographer and you only have $1,800 for a budget, don’t ask them if they can work with your budget because chances are they will not.

That being said however if the same photographer was $2,000 and your budget is $1,800, you may be in a much better position to meet in the middle at $1,900.