That’s a bit of a vague question I know, but it’s important to know what sort of wedding day you want, after all, it will effect your budget and the amount of stress that you will have on your day too.

No two weddings are alike, they come in all sizes, budgets, themes, colors and styles and there is truly no right or wrong to making the day, YOUR day.

I’d like to take a few minutes and talk about the various types of weddings to see which one you best fit. Each style fits a different personality and budget, so choosing one that is important to you will effect many factors.

The Elopement

Sometimes known as the ‘courthouse wedding’, the elopement is generally a very small ceremony with you, your spouse, maybe a couple of friend or immediate family. Often times the ceremony is quick, within 10-20 minutes tops and is somewhat informal.

Some couples opt to get married at the courthouse, while others, at a friends house, perhaps a familiar spot or romantic place to them. This could be at the beach, under a tree, at a gazebo or the like.

Pros of an Elopement

• They are very small, can be very intimate

• They are the most affordable of the group

• They are not long

Cons of an Elopement

• Not everyone will attend

• There is no reception afterwards

• They are basic in nature

Elopements can range from a couple hundred bucks to a couple thousand. Carole and I for example had a small elopement style wedding under a tree and bench that we often sat and talked during our lunches. With the kids and a couple of friends (some were vendors), it was a simple day for about $1,500 total.

The Micro Wedding

Micro weddings have actually been around for a long time, although they have been popularized by the events of COVID in 2020 and 2021. They are classified as weddings with under 50 people and a small ceremony followed by a small and somewhat quick reception.

Think 3-5 hours for the entire process, not 8-10 like a traditional day.

Couples have choose this route in recent years because it allowed them to still have the wedding day, just in a condensed form. In 2022, there has been less of the micro weddings because restrictions have opened up a lot, although there is still a general sense of wanting to save money and the micro-wedding gives you the feel of a full wedding day without all the expense.

Ceremonies are roughly the same, while the reception will be much smaller, you may only have an introduction and first dance, but not other things like a cake cutting or bouquet toss. Instead of a meal, it’s typically heavy hors d'oeuvres and there is not much dancing.

Pros of a Micro-Wedding

• They are similar to a traditional wedding, just half the time

• You still have a ceremony, you still have a reception, although condensed

• Much more affordable

  • Average micro or mini wedding costs $5,000-$11,000

  • Average traditional wedding $34,800 (the Knot)

Cons of a Micro-Wedding

• Limited number of people to attend

• Much faster than the full day wedding

• You will not have every tradition (think garter toss or all the first dances)

The Traditional Wedding

Most brides tend to fall into this category and it’s heavily based on well, tradition. From your wedding dress to all the things that a full day has, like a first look, ceremony and all the reception bits, introductions, first dance, father-daughter dance, mother-son dance, toasts, cake cutting, garter toss and bouquet toss to elements that are optional like things like the shoe game.

The traditional wedding day is usually 8-10 hours long and you have a bridal party ranging from just a few to upwards of 25 people, and your guest list usually ranges from 70-300 depending on the guest list.

Couples will many times fall into the money trap of weddings wanting to keep up with the “Jones’s” with trying to spend money where they simply do not need, like custom labels on water bottles or over-the-top décor. Although they are smaller line items, they add up quickly.

Plan on spending anywhere from $10,000 to $50,000 or more depending on your location and all the belles and whistles vendors have to offer.

Pros of a Traditional Wedding

• You will have everyone you want at the wedding day

• They last a full day

• You will have all the traditional elements of the day that you want

Cons of a Traditional Wedding

• They tend to cost a lot for the couple

• They tend to be stressful, lots of decisions need to be made

The Elegant Wedding

This is the type of wedding that is very over-the-top, money is not really a concern and those that can afford it, do it. Here, I want you to think magazine level quality, with roughly 1.7% of couples in the United States choosing this option. It’s the traditional wedding glammed up, with couples spending far more than needed, ranging from $50,000 upwards of $500,000 or more, yes, $500,000+.

The overall idea here it not to impress friends, but to show off that you’ve got money and it’s easily tossed around.

In Virginia, Charlottesville tends to be the states go-to for expensive weddings where venues alone can range from $20,000 to $100,000 just by themselves.

Even wedding vendors have their own niche for this style of high-end marketplace and it’s hard to break into it. I myself have only done 3 of these types of weddings where they cost more than $150,000.

Pros of an Elegant Wedding

• This category of wedding will impress everyone at the wedding

• It will make waves withing the wedding industry

Cons of an Elegant Wedding

• Be prepared to spare no expense, most readers will not be able to afford this

• It’s more about the show than a celebration

There is NO Right or Wrong

I want you to understand that when it comes to weddings, what is best is the one that YOU can afford, not what others WANT you to have, I see it too many times on places like social media with brides wanting to find a vendor or venue and asking whom they used in order to get an idea of spending.

Spend what you can afford and opt for a wedding that best suites your personality, your needs and your budget, not what others have done before you.

You’ll be a lot less stressed choosing the right one and you’re pocketbook will thank you for it too!